No one wants me around

So, as you know my son was diagnosed with Aspergers a few summers ago and a few months ago with ADHD. We'll, we knew it was coming shortly after the Aspergers diagnosis. It just wasn't all adding up. There was more to it then JUST Aspergers.  The impulse control, the social issues, the calling out, the no friends. No one wanted him around. No one understands him. He tries to hang, they push him away. He gets angry and acts out. He acts out because he is unwanted, unloved and invalidated. They actually make things up about him to keep him away. And because of his "issues" most people just say, it's you Bubba, you're the problem. Not them, not understanding him, not their immaturity, not their ignorance. It's not their job to understand or accept him. You can't force people to deal with or accept another person.  So, we finally resorted to medication because he fell behind in school. I never wanted to be one of those mothers who medicate their kids and turn them into a zombie. I always thought children diagnosed with ADHD just needed their ass beat. Until I met my own son. But this med was the opposite. Three weeks on meds and we notice, his counselor notices, his teachers notice. He has a chart in school and the marks go to 14 in the  and 14 in the pm.  The marks went from 1's and 3's to 13's and 14's.  So, we think wow, this is a miracle. But this is not without mishaps. Today at my nephews birthday party. It's all going fine when all of a sudden my nephew comes upstairs and says, "you gotta do something about Bubba, he's hitting my friends and spitting on them." Holy Crap, my son is hitting strangers and spitting in them. How horrible. Shocked and appalled, I run downstairs and grab him and get him out of there. He tells me over and over that he didn't do it. That he was just asking over and over again if he could play the new video gaming system with them but they were ignoring h and when he was getting upset they were laughing and making fun of him. But who believes him. No one. I take him home. And go back to get my other children once I settle him down. In the meantime, the friends don't know he leaves and they call his name in a very strange voice. Why, if you don't want him around, why, why, are you calling his name in a silly voice???? To rile him up again, so he can get in trouble again? What the fuck is wrong with people?  He is a little boy. Not a circus freak!!!!!!!!!  People feel sorry for me.  Don't feel sorry for. I understand him. You don't and choose not to. They want to know why he can't sit still!!! They wonder where his impulse control is. It's not there. Its his brain. It misfires. I am so tired of explaining to people. So so so tired of explaining why my son does what he does. The medication can only do so much and it does wear off. All day long he is amazing. One thing happens and it all spirals. It goes to shit!!!! I upset my sister, my daughters and myself. We became topic of conversation after we left.  Tired of my son being topic of conversation. So very tired of it. Im tired of people pushing him away. I'm tired of people's ignorance of autism, Aspergers and ADHD. Until my son was born I didn't believe ADHD existed. I tell you people, it does and it makes him sad, it makes him feel alone and very isolated. He doesn't have a single friend in the world and at age 9, I, his mom, am his only friend. And that's sad. He doesn't feel as if people love him. Especially his only male cousin remotely close to him. How can I explain to my son why his is the way he his. How do you explain to this beautiful, funny amazing boy why he does what he does.  How do I beat it into people's heads that he's not a bad boy and to stop pushing him away.  I think if these children felt understood or validated, they wouldn't feel the need to bother people. They wouldn't have that need because they felt included.  With me blood is thicker than water at anytime. Never treat anyone like shit. Never deliberately embarrass someone, especially your family. Never tell lies about them. Never  turn your back on your family. Always be there for them. Never think of them as a nuisance. But think of them as an amazing, wonderful gift from God. Everyone is different. I bet if you got to know my son, you would think he was a really cool kid. He's smart, he's funny and his vocabulary is large. He understands more than you think. He has feeling and they hurt just as much as yours do when they are stomped all over.